Duck walks into clothing store, says, ‘Got any grapes?’
Clothing clerk: ‘No, this is a clothing store store.’ Duck walks out.
Next day, duck returns, asks, ‘Got any grapes?’
Clothing clerk: (irritated) ‘No! I told you yesterday. You think this is a fruit stand?’
Next day, duck returns, asks: ‘Got any grapes?’
Clothing clerk: (shouting) ‘NO! You come in here and ask that again, and I’ll nail your beak to the floor!’
Duck: ‘Got any nails?’
Clothing clerk: (shrieks) NO! What now? You think this is HARDWARE store?’
Duck: ‘Got any grapes?’
Two caterpillars watch a pupae burst open and see a beautiful butterfly stretch its wings and fly away. Caterpillar A says to B, ‘You’ll never catch me up in one of those things!’
Baby camel: ‘Dad, why do we have humps on our backs?;
Father camel: ‘Our humps have fat necessary to sustain us out in the desert.’
Baby camel: ‘Dad, why do we have long eyelashes?’
Father camel: ‘To protect our eyes from sandstorms raging in the desert.’
Baby camel: ‘Dad, why do we have big padded feet?’
Father camel: ‘To keep from sinking in the soft desert sand.’
Baby camel: ‘I understand now. So why are we in the city zoo?’
A mother kangaroo jumps in the air with a squeal, then glares down into her pouch and shouts, ‘How many times do I have to tell you? No moking in bed!’
Two sheep in a field. Sheep A says, ‘BAAAA.’
Sheep B: ‘I was going to say that!’
What happened to two bedbugs who fell in love? They got married in the spring.
How do you catch a gorilla? Hide in a tree and make a noise like a banana.
What’s light, white, sweet and hangs from trees? A meringuetan.
What kind of monkey can fly? A hot-air baboon