Three contractors–one from Chicago, one from Tennessee, one from Minnesota–bid to fix a broken fence at the White House.  All three go with a White House official to examine the fence.

After work with a tape measure and calculation, the Minnesota contractor says, ‘I figure the job will run about $900: $400 for materials, $400 for my crew and $100 profit for me.’

The Tennessee contractor measures, calculates and says, ‘I can do this job for $700: $300 for materials, $300 for my crew and $100 profit for me.’

The Chicago contractor measures nothing, just leans over to the White House official and whispers, ‘$2,700.’

The official, incredulous, says, ‘You didn’t even measure like the other guys!  How did you come up with such a high figure?’

The Chicago contractor whispers back, ‘$1000 for me, $1000 for you, and we hire the guy from Tennessee to fix the fence.’

‘Done!’ replies the government official.

That’s how the new stimulus plan will work.  (If the Senate complains that this is illegal and/or unethical, a former community organizer who made it big will ‘put in a good word’ for the Chicago contractor–he has practice in this sort of thing regarding Senatorial replacements.)